Kelly Clarkson has, without a doubt, had a rollercoaster ride to fame. She came onto the scene after winning the first-ever season of American Idol and, since then, she’s now made a name for herself as a late-night talk show host

I’ve been indulging in albums that defined my childhood as of late, not able to shake the grip that nostalgia has on me — especially not after my 22nd birthday, of course, and the impending doom that lockdown brought. Revisiting old albums I loved back when the biggest worry I had was passing my SATs provided a comfort blanket in a time where it felt like Groundhog Day at every waking moment. 

Growing up as the youngest of five means you absorb all sorts of music. After all, having siblings that have ten years on you means you’ve got a whole encyclopedia of music at your fingertips, waiting to be discovered. On one hand, my sister would be playing Britney, Rihanna, Steps, and all that wonderful 00s pop that gets played on the cringe floor of a club nowadays, and my brothers would be blasting Blink-182, The Offspring and anything you’d hear on an emo night at your local. There was never a dull moment discovering music in my house. 

Back in the day, I was a frequent library-goer (thanks in part to our lack of Wi-Fi or computer to study on) and I’d check books out upon every visit. The Princess Diaries was one (well, there are about ten in the series — I only read one and six) of them. At this point in my life, and only having one sister, meant that it had to be her who took on the coveted position of educating me in pop culture; subsequently, this included the two movie adaptations of said books. 

In The Princess Diaries 2: Royal Engagement (2004), one of the songs that featured on the soundtrack was Breakaway, which would go on to become one of my favourite songs during my childhood — no thanks to the film, or the CD my sister owned of the album. When I hear that song now, it takes me back to driving away from a Summer holiday in Bournemouth, grumpily sitting in the back of the car, begrudged to be departing so soon. That song was playing in the car, and I was reenacting the same solemn solo music video performance we’ve all seen (and done) a hundred times. Listening to it again, right now, it transports me back and sends a shiver down my spine; if I close my eyes, just for a split second I might be seven again. If only life could be that simple. 

Back when I listened to music by flicking through channels on the TV, I would search for a song I loved: I remember Since U Been Gone playing on MTV, and I can still picture the music video from beginning to end. The other day I requested the same song at a nightclub, some fourteen or so years later. Yes, they played it. And, yes, it’s probably the best song I’ve ever heard in a club. It well and truly holds up to this day; an eclectic cut from the “girl next door” who was dipping her foot in the pool of rock, and it massively paid off. 

This album is Kelly Clarkson undoubtedly at her best: Thankful, her debut, has some memorable tracks like Miss Independent, Beautiful Disaster, and Low, but it doesn’t compare to the second offering that shows her completely step away from her origins (she won the first-ever American Idol in 2002). Her first album doesn’t stray far away from being anything more than the debut-from-a-talent-contest-winner and is notably held back, constrained by the need to be PG in order to go with the image American Idol wanted her to have. Sure, it has some noteworthy tracks, but Breakaway is an album that is impossible to pause; an album that shows Kelly as she wanted the world to see her, and is a near-perfect attribution to her discography.

Once she regained control over her career trajectory, she etched out a unique sound that set her apart from the likes of Nelly Furtado, Hilary Duff and Jessica Simpson, who were all releasing music around the same time. 

Having her second album start off with the title track was a risky bet, and letting it flow into the raucous break-up anthem that is Since U Been Gone was even riskier, and yet somehow this makes for an irrevocably entertaining opening to what would go on to be a career-defining album. After all, Breakaway went six times platinum and is Clarkson’s best-selling album to date. It was the reinvention of Kelly Clarkson only a year after she had released her sparkling, held-back debut. Even the difference in the album artwork on the two albums is noticeable: one shows her smiling with a white, angelic background and the other is notably edgier, with Kelly glimpsing at the camera through honey-toned hair. 

Similarly, Behind These Hazel Eyes is another unabashed banger and is targeted at an ex. It’s unbelievable how many of the songs on this album would slot right into place on a party playlist and this one is no different. It’s cut from the same cloth as its predecessor and is similar in the way it hits you right in the heart. To be frank, this whole album is full of songs that pull on your heartstrings. 

I have to emotionally prepare myself for what’s to come next: Because of You, another song that hits me with that familiar feeling of nostalgia, reminding me of when my sister gave me her copy of the album and, to this day, I still own it. Even now, when it has a huge crack running through it, I could never let it go. It’s a piece of who I am, right? I probably wouldn’t be writing this, that’s for sure. 

This album came out seventeen years ago, yet somehow I still remember sitting on my bed, pretend sad, and imagining my heart was shattering as I listened to it through one of those portable CD players (passed down via my brother this time). It wasn’t. I was too young to be heartbroken over anything but a pet dying. Some songs will do that to you: throw you into an alternate universe within three whole minutes. 

Interestingly, Because of You was meant for her debut album but was rejected by her record label for being “too depressing”. So, Kelly did what any normal person would do when faced with rejection and sent it to two members of Evanescence, who then jumped on board to put the finishing touches on what would become one of her most notable and popular tracks to date. I don’t think I’ve come across a single soul who hasn’t heard it (apart from my boyfriend, apparently). It’s her most successful track — and it almost never saw the light of day. 

Because of You might be the only song on the album not centred around a break-up; instead, being an ode to her father who, at the time, was divorcing her mother, and this is told through Kelly in the accompanying music video. It’s a tearjerker. 

After the solemn break, we’re back to another break-up song (I mean, this is definitely a break-up album so, by all means, please help it get you through one) and this time it’s the lesser-known Gone. It holds itself amongst the massively well-received singles, proving that this album isn’t just a front. It’s the real deal; it’s much more than a ‘pop stars turn at rock’ but a symbol of a girl breaking out of a mould and producing something that she would struggle to match further along in her career. Granted, 2009’s All I Ever Wanted starts off incredibly strong with the lead single My Life Would Suck Without You but struggles to rise — let alone match — to the standard set by her previous releases and is an album I’m not sure I’d play past track one. 

One of my favourites on Breakaway is the brilliantly ineffable Addicted: another one produced and co-written alongside Ben Moody and David Hodges (Evanescence). It’s like a mixture of all the songs we’ve just heard; it takes all the best parts of each track and combines them to make a desperately haunting, cutthroat song that would make you think Clarkson had been making rock songs her whole life. Everything about it — from the lyrical content to the snippets of strings in the background — sounds as if they were made to go together. It was always going to be hard for her to top this album with a song so well-strung on it. It’s like she took all of her best singles and put them all on one album. Fairplay, I suppose. Peaking early on in your career isn’t always bad. 

Where Is Your Heart is, of course, another break-up song but, somehow, this theme never tires, not when the lyrics read like poetry: “I want your heart to bleed, that’s all I’m asking for.” This song goes hand-in-hand with the softer, slower songs on the rest of the album but is incomparable in its repetitive nature; showing more from her than I’d expect. 

The first song that features Kelly talk-singing is Walk Away, a song that is as fierce as it is funny. I mean, it has Kelly talk-rapping a whole verse about the man in question. Let’s not forget the lyrics, “I waited here for you, like a kid waiting after school.” Lyrical genius. While probably the weakest song on the album, it’s not bad, but the lyrics could’ve had some revision before going into production. Not that it was only her writing them — this track has three co-writers alongside Kelly herself. 

You Found Me is an iconic offering and brings a similar sound like that of the aforementioned Evanescence, but doesn’t go any further into that territory. It touches upon a rockier sound, yet never strays any further across the border; it hangs loosely on the edge and is definitive of the sound on this particular album. Like many other pop stars, Kelly doesn’t always write her own songs — this one was written by Kara DioGuardi, who is behind other hits like Melanie Martinez’s Pity Party, Kylie Minogue’s Spinning Around and Avril Lavigne’s Runaway. Not only did she write You Found Me, but she also leant her lyricism to a handful of other songs on this album: Gone, Walk Away, Hear Me and I Hate Myself For Losing You. 

It leaves me wondering if the release of “pop-punk Queen” Avril Lavigne’s hugely successful debut album Let Go (2002) had anything to do with Kelly Clarkson’s sudden foray into the pop-rock world. At the time, she was being compared to fellow pop singers Christina Aguilera and Britney Spears, the latter having an “innocent” image during the early noughties that Clarkson narrowly escaped.

Perhaps, the sudden success of Avril Lavigne — who was signed to a major label at the tender age of sixteen — and her “tomboy skater” image, made Kelly able to convince her agent to let her have more input into her music. After all, the Canadian star’s highly successful second album, Under My Skin (2004), was released six months before Kelly’s — that’s plenty of time for Clarkson’s team to take notes and fight her corner. Whether it had anything to do with Avril’s success, it was the perfect direction, and it worked. 

Of course, the Avril Lavigne similarities could as well have been pulled from that time in 2002 when Clarkson handed the former an award just to be met with an “elbow to the face” (I don’t see it in a malicious context, maybe you do). Speaking about the incident with Howard Stern in 2017 there’s clearly no bad blood — Avril even co-wrote Breakaway two years after the awards show took place. Quite a way to meet your future collaborator, I suppose.

After You Found Me comes the honest I Hate Myself For Losing You, which adds an element of story-telling to the album; as if the concept is the ups-and-downs of relationships — platonic or not. If you’re going through a break-up and want them back (for whatever reason), this is the song. If that doesn’t work, try every other song on this album. One of them will provide you with a warm blanket, and maybe bring you to your senses in the meantime. 

Continuing her theme of banger-banger-sad, repeat, comes to Hear Me, a song that’s layered with ethereal vocals and a crescendo that shows off her impressive range. It’s complex, and it ends there. After the ups and downs we’re taken through, it feels as if we end too soon. Sure, at the end of the album there’s a live rendition of Beautiful Disaster and studio versions of Low and Miss Independent — two tracks that were released on her debut album. I’m not sure what they’re doing on Breakaway. Maybe they’re lost. 

Cruises down memory lane can be unexpected. Listening back to an album that shows the development of a girl shot to overnight stardom to someone honing their own sound; actually thinking about the process, rather than having everything handed to them and told that their sound would be a certain way. This is certainly a pop album that can be enjoyed by even the harshest of critics.